I selfhost my own email and you are absolutely correct it is musch easier to receive than to send. I use a 3rd party to send all my outgoing mail on my behalf.

Exactly!

I should have prefaced my situation better: I live in a country where the ISP censors certain websites and online services. The closest Linode is not on my continent (so the latency is noticeable). So my need to be connected to the Wireguard VPN really depends on what I’m doing. Having a split DNS system is seamless and I only activate the VPN manually as needed (both at home and when I’m out) Otherwise I would have just asked my ISP for a static IP, opened some ports and installed tailscale for everything else.